M & M & M's

Not sure why I am starting all these "series" like posts but... my blog, my rules. :)

My husband has a site called Stuff My Kids Say and this is just my version.

Most Memorable Moments
It doesn't matter if they are good or bad, funny or sweet. I want to remember these things years from now and maybe even a day from now when I am not really sure why I ever made the decision to have children in the first place.

Me: Parker, I am going to be in Ryleigh's room getting her to sleep for a nap. Do NOT come in there for any reason. Well, if there is blood or bones you can come get me. If you have a question about your game or food or toys, even if it seems like it is an emergency, it can wait. If the house catches on fire you can come get me. Ok. You know what, you DO NOT come in there for anything at all. If you have a question, ask Rogan. If Rogan thinks it is important enough to ask me right away then he can come and ask me.

*I get Ryleigh to sleep with no peeps from anyone and go check on the boys*

Parker: Mom, if Rogan is dying and I am dying but he is going to die first, can I come get you and tell you that?

Really?? Where does he come up with this stuff??

FAQ's and FGA's: #2

These are fun. They really are. MOST of the time they are asked by people with a really good sense of humor. There are always the old ladies at Walmart who are grumps but they are the exception, not the rule.

It always starts here:
Question 1: How many kids do you have?!

Answer 1: 5
Answer 2: (and its variations) A lot. Enough. Too many.
Answer 3: You looking to buy?

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Question 2: How did you get all those kids?

Answer 1: One at a time.
Answer 2: Well, when a mommy and daddy love each other very much...
Answer 3: I found them.
Answer 4: What kids??

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Question 3: Do you know what causes that?
^^Most of the time this is actually said "Don't you know what causes that?" and to THAT I cannot giveth thou an answer.

Answer 1: Yep, but it's kinda like crack. One hit and you just can't quit.
^^Yes, I say this just about every time. I should probably stop.^^
Answer 2: You can prevent it?!?!

*People like to throw in the "Don't you own a TV?" every once in a while. What does TV have to do with anything? My typical answer is usually along the lines of "Don't be mad just because I have more entertaining things to do with my time."*

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Question 4: Are they all yours?
^^Yes, this is a normal question. It is when it is asked in an obvious situation that makes it worth trying to get a reaction.^^

Answer 1: Almost.
Answer 2: Only the good/cute/funny ones.
Answer 3: Nope. I pay them a nickel for every time they call me mom.

^^To be fair, when my kids are going crazy in the store, I tend to say "When I tell your parents about this..." a little TOO loud.^^

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Then there are the times when me and the kiddos are off to explore the world. Or just go to the grocery store.

Question 5: Are you taking them all? *GASP* By yourself?

Answer 1:What?! That would be crazy! I have a mouse in my pocket.
Answer 2: Ummmm.....
Answer 3: I just take a couple of them at a time. The rest I leave at home locked in a padded room.

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Disclaimer:
This is meant to be funny. I love my children. All 78 of them.

FAQ's and FGA's (Frequently Given Answers): #1

I have to do it. I probably shouldn't do it. But I have to.

I can't help it and I really hope we are all still friends after all these posts. I do not take offense to most of the Frequently Asked Questions but at some point I've gotta come up with something to say so I don't lose any more of my mind. These are questions anyone would ask in conversation or when you know someone but when asked out of the blue, by strangers, they tend to throw you off just a little.

Here we go.

Question 1: How old are you?

Answer 1: *Raises eyebrows*.......
^^Ummmm..... sometimes I really let the silence stretch out. I am quite good at awkward silences. But really?! Rude.^^

Answer 2: 31.
^^And here it comes.... "I would have thought you were *insert anywhere from 16 to 24 here*. Well, when you get to be my age..."

Why do they never finish that statement? What will I do when I get to be there age? And how old are they? I don't know because I don't ask because 90% of the time it is an older lady who says this. I do appreciate it, I really do. The part that amuses me the most about this statement is that is doesn't matter if the exact same syllables were already rolling off of the persons tongue, if I jump in and say, "Well, when I get to be your age..." they never find it quite as clever.^^

My favorite variation of this question is "What are you? About 16?"
And yes, when this is asked, they say "what are you".

This leads us to one of my favorite answers for just about anything I get asked:

ALMOST

It's Not Lazy, It's Science

So, I do believe that I have once and for all, and possibly scientifically, proven that the theory of evolution is a myth. We are going to say that I did an experiment. I won't mention how long this experiment lasted. One because it was so long I don't really remember and two because if I did remember people would die of shock and I would probably go to jail for some form of neglect.

All that said, my toilet and the floor around it are now clean. Not once in this undetermined length of time did anything grow legs and climb out of it (that I know of). When I say there was ample time and opportunity please trust me because there was AMPLE time and opportunity.

So that's it. While my kid is working on his science experiment I finished up one of my own. At least that is the way I am choosing to see it.

Boy Meets Girl

When people find out that I got married at the ripe, old age of 18, they generally all respond the same way. You really have to have a visual for this. First, there is the look of confusion. Remember Sylvester and Tweety? "I tawt I taw a puddy tat?" That is it! Confusion. Once the brain has processed the numbers one and eight together, in that order, we move on. Next is the light bulb going off combined with a slightly shocked look. This is the "I did! I did! I did tee a puddy tat!". Now here is where they like to switch it up on you. There are some people who generally do not know how to respond. It isn't the norm and so they kinda go through a huge range of feelings all at once and then settle for nothing. Show no emotion. They are generally at a loss for words and completely confused by this curve ball. Then there are the people who's eyes get large and they start looking me up and down like I just sprouted a few arms and turned an awkward shade of green. I think my favorite reaction is the one of horror. Just plain and simple. These people will seriously look at you like they fear for their life. Processing how you feel about this "bizarre" occurrence just about always determines the line of questioning. The people who look like they got a bad case of the botox generally stick with the safe responses like "oh" or "that's nice". The people who make the "I thought I was talking to a person but now I realize it's a sea monster in disguise" face go with "why did you get married so young" or "where were your parents"? Then there are the people who make the "this person just pulled out a shotgun and is holding puppies hostage" face. They typically go with "were you pregnant"?

*Climbs onto soapbox and adjusts microphone*
Seriously. Were you pregnant? First of all. Rude. Second, does it matter? And, if I were to say yes, what is your response? Is your marriage better than someone else's because of certain circumstances? I give props to anyone who can withstand the stress of being young, as well as pregnant, and make a marriage work.
*Sighs, steps down*

Where were my parents?
Around. That is what I have to say about that. There are so many dynamics to the relationships I have with the people in my life that I just can't get into. I am not saying this as a negative thing. If I needed anyone, my mom, dad, step-mom, grandmother, all I had to do was pick up a phone.

Why did you get married so young? Well, to that I mostly answer "why not?" There are so many pros and cons to getting married at 18 but I knew it was the right thing for me. You don't see a lot of couples who were married young that stay married. I wish I had some great wisdom to pass on to people. A list of criteria I could hand out or a checklist of some sort. It just didn't happen that way. I just knew.

I was 13 when I met Charles. Back when Brother Richard was the youth pastor and we had just finished the first discipleship classes he held. My leaders, formerly known as Julie Broxson and Amber Linkenhoker, were great. When we graduated, Bill and Shannon hosted a party at their house for everyone. I think at the time they only had 4 children. Crazy to think that was ever the case. So, here we are, me and the bestie Heather. I don't remember how or when but I am sure at some point Charles and I are introduced. We didn't really talk much but I remember that he popped one of those big rubber bouncy balls like they sell at Walmart. You know the ones. It's the huge square contraption made of a few PVC pipes and rubber bands. The one that draws anyone under the height of 4'6" like moths to a flame. Seriously, stand on your knees and imagine seeing a 10-foot tower of bouncy balls. This display, for lack of a better word, emits a high radio frequency that only children can hear. It gives them exact instructions on how to strategically pull at just one of the outer bands in order to release half of the balls like super charged atoms. When, and if, you can manage to wrangle up your child, as well as any of the escaped, colorful orbs, you get to spend the next 10 minutes doing your best Michael Jordan impression because you know one wrong push (or pull) on any of those scarce little bungees will send the rest of those rubbery projectiles scattering to the ends of the earth.

And back to the story. He popped the rubber ball. At some point later he had dropped his retainer on the ground and someone shoved it in my pocket. I gave him back his slobber and dirt covered piece of plastic. And that was it. Now, I know what you are all thinking.

*swoon*

After a chance meeting like that? Popped bouncy balls, spit and mud covered retainers, 10 whole words, maybe. Ahhh. A match made in heaven. How could anyone not be head over heels in love from that moment on, right? Still, I knew. I'm not sure what exactly I knew but I did have a feeling that he and I weren't done. I didn't see him again after that, not even at church. I was 13 and busy being all that a new teenager can be, he was 16, had a girlfriend and a baby on the way. We went our separate ways.

I moved to Texas for a while before moving back here for my last three years of high school. He graduated, joined the Marine Corps and went through school in California before moving back to this area. While he had popped up once or twice since we met, it was never more that a fleeting thought and that same feeling of knowing. As I am leaving school one afternoon I happened to look over and see him sitting in his car. I walked right past him perfectly content to go on about my plans but that same knowing sense had me turning around to say hello. We talked for a minute but I had to go but we exchanged numbers and over the next few weeks started talking. After that, well, the rest is history.

Now if I were to tell you that our relationship was perfect and that it developed and grew into love, yeah, that would be a big, fat lie. Even though I knew that he was the man that God had for me and wanted me to marry, there wasn't a whole lot of Godly going on. Honestly, at times, it was volatile. It was messy and it got really ugly. At the same time, it was amazing. He made me feel happy. He made me feel safe. He made me feel loved.

So, yes, I got married at 18. I still believe it was the right decision for me. Did I make sacrifices? Absolutely. Do I feel like I missed out on things? Sure. It isn't like I spent my childhood daydreaming of the day I turned 18 so that I could grab a white dress and the first man who would take me and rush him down the aisle. I was accepted to colleges and had scholarships. I knew what career I wanted to have. My plans changed. Do I regret my choice? No. There are too many choices, good and bad, day in and day out, that will effect your life. You can't change them but you can learn from all of them. I don't regret the way our relationship started and the struggles we had to go through because of it. I don't regret getting married young even though it has had it's own set of challenges. It is our life and our journey. If we had done things differently I am sure some of it could have been a little easier but we wouldn't be where we are today. For that I am thankful.

Honey, About That...

I think we are headed to an "on again" in the off again, on again cycle of my little ol' piece of cyber space. That little place where I can post all of my random musings and then pester all of my friends until they have no choice but to read the insane ramblings that somehow made it, if incoherently, from the ether, to my brain, out of my fingers, onto my little keyboard and then out here for all of you to endure, I mean, enjoy, that's it, ENJOY!

While learning about Hinduism in a class this last week I told the hubs:

"Babe, did you know those people have a god of housework? Seriously, they go and worship this lady god and ask her to give them less housework to do. I could totally see myself being converted just for that."

My husband, the amazing and supportive man that he is, answered something like this:

"I think if you did any less housework, you and the house would cease to exist."

Sad but true, folks.

Practice What You Pinterest: Circle Zip Earbud Pouches

Many of you know that I sing at church. Let's not go into whether or not I do it well or if it is my charming personality that makes them keep me around. Either way, there it is. What no one realizes is that every time I get half way to church just to remember that my earbuds are at home and I have to turn around to go get them. I have been looking for something to keep them in for a while now. I was originally thinking something that the cord can wrap around as well but then I came across this little zippered pouch. I love it! Not only can I keep my earbuds (or really anything) in it, I can also put it on my key chain. Now I really can't forget them! The tutorial comes from www.erinerickson.com and was incredibly easy to follow.

I know a lot of you do not sew at all but for those who do, even beginners, I would recommend this tutorial! I had all of the materials at my house so I made this item for free! I have made a couple and so I did go out and buy a few zippers because I have a couple more in the works. Prior to this I had never installed a zipper but with the instructions and the pictures to follow it went very smooth. From start to finish this project took me about an hour and that includes the kiddos running around. The pouch ends up being a good size, I think about 5 inches around, and you can make it with any fabric pattern you want. I would like to try to make this in a fake leather material and see how it would turn out.

The basic instructions are to cut out your materials following the downloadable pattern provided. You need a main fabric, a lining fabric and an interfacing. I used a piece of felt. You will have two half circles that you will attach the zipper to and then a whole circle for the back piece. Sew them together with right sides facing and turn it inside out. Then add a top stitch. There are a few more little steps but that is the basics. Super easy and these would make a great gift for just about anyone! If you have any questions about these please ask.

Here are the two that I have made so far:



and mine:



Enjoy!